Magnificos Bastardos

DT Gets Schaberg-ed

The professional goes down, following “a momentary point of weakness” and a two-beer, four-Vesper Montecito Club evening the night before. Dan caught himself in the blast radius. Baxter was also affected.

Chez Dickie: The Tahoe Trip

Four months of herding cats, two candidate weeks and one Splitwise later, the Society convened at DT’s place on the seventh hole. Sunday: dinner at Moody’s and a tee time at Gray’s Crossing. Monday: a half-day boat out of Tahoe Vista, then Chef’s steak fajitas for the house and cornhole at PJ’s. Tuesday: Old Greenwood, with a closest-to-the-pin contest on the short par threes.

Beds were allocated by arrival time, the last man in getting the office pullout. Patrick declared himself a snorer and volunteered to share anyway. One set of clubs missed a connection at SFO and was retrieved from Reno by a man who simply tracked the flight and drove.

There Can Be Only One

Highlander on the big screen on State Street, after two and a half hours at Joe’s. Patrick, who missed it, proposed a Society tagline: “There can always be more than one!”

The Police Visit

The cops showed up at Chef’s right after everyone had left, a first for Bill P. The next morning Dan and Chef tore out the old fence and fit the whole thing in Chef’s truck, earning a double punch on the man card.

Brats & Mai Tais

Dan “mastered the brat,” then dropped a burned marshmallow and walked it around the house. There was a quarters game. Patrick named the Allez Allez Mbappé. Not one chip in the marble.

The Van Run & the Birth of Four Balls

Patrick drives DT to Tahoe in a commercial van (8 hours 45 minutes). He shoots 153 at Gray’s Crossing playing four balls, and Dan dubs him Patty Four Balls on the spot. He takes the 395 home, down the back side of the Sierra.

Cousteau Is Admitted

DT pitches a beanie, Patrick objects, and Dan mocks it up on Jacques Cousteau. Patrick names him. Phelps: “Honorary member.” The busiest day in thread history.

The Half Marathon(s)

Dan runs 13.1 miles in Solvang, averaging under 8:30 a mile uphill, hours after two pisco sours and three Vespers. The night before, DT and Phelps had completed what they call the half marathon of Vespers.

The First Dinner, and the Domain

First full MB night at DT’s: Chef on the grill, a burger supreme, and eight orange, eight clear and eleven brown ice balls. Next morning Phelps finds the domain is available, and the merch committee convenes on the spot.

The Schaberg Incident

Gardening, one agave spine, one finger, surgery, stitches, and a permanent place on the crest. Full report.

The Founding

DT means to text “Los extraño” (I miss you guys) and sends “Los extraños” (the strangers). Phelps corrects the record, and the chat is renamed seven minutes later.

The Alpine Plunge

While the rest of the house went to Gray’s Crossing, the diving division went the other way and got in the lake. Phelps’s first Tahoe dive, DT’s umpteenth. The send-off DT posted to the group that morning is not printable here, and the water was, reportedly, cold.

The Pacific Campaign

Patrick and DT log a run of Hawaiian dives, founding the diving division and giving everyone else something to ignore photos of.

Die Hard at the Riviera

A 4K restoration and cocktails at El Encanto beforehand. DT warned everyone that he and Aiden recite the whole movie. Dan confirmed: sitting between them is “like stereo.”